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Neurotypical Disorder

Note: This page is satire based on the American Psychiatrist Association's diagnostic criteria for autism, as well as how autism is generally treated in the mainstream. The content herein imagines how the default of neurotypicalism might be viewed if autistic people instead made up the vast majority of the population. Nothing here is expressly intended to offend anyone. The biting tone of this page is a reflection of how the oppressive powers-that-be label autistic people both "disabled" and "disordered", and even label our very existences "tragic", all in response to natural differences, behaviours, and traits no less innocuous than the ones described on this page.

For the record, I am merely the latest of many to make a satire page in this vein. Lamentably, I have no idea at this point who the original creator of such things was and thus cannot credit them for inventing the joke.

Neurotypical Disorder is a pervasive, life-long developmental disability that causes considerable challenges and distress. People with neurotypicalism - usually referred to as neurotypicals - often possess many peculiar behaviours that set them apart from normal (autistic) people and cause them difficulty in social interactions. While neurotypicalism is a disability and neurotypicals tend away from having high IQs, some neurotypicals can be quite gifted and capable of living a normal life.

There has been a surge in online content from movements led by neurotypicals and a minority of normal people who sympathise with them, professing that neurotypicals are not disabled and that neurotypicalism is a healthy, natural difference. We advise you to ignore such nonsense if you have the misfortune of encountering it. Non-autistics are not intellectually capable of truly speaking for themselves, and you should always remember to only consult normal, autistic people about matters that pertain to neurotypicals. Do not question why that sounded like it came directly from the mouth of a cult leader. This is SCIENCE speaking!

These movements, alternatively labeling themselves as "neurotypical rights"; "neurotypical pride"; and "neurotypical acceptance", often use a symbol resembling a grey zero. This appears to be an attempt to celebrate the tragically standardised brains that characterise neurotypicalism, in direct contrast to the rainbow infinity symbol that is used to symbolise the normal autistic majority.

Satirical Neurotypical Pride Symbol - Pictured to the left, the "neurotypical pride" symbol, apparently celebrating their uniform brains.
Autistic Pride Symbol - Pictured to the left, the famous symbol of the normal Autistic majority, celebrating our natural mental diversity.

In the psychiatric community, we use the magnifying glass symbol to represent the enigmatic nature of neurotypical disorder and the arduous task of searching for clues to better understand it. Despite decades of research that involved exhausting every avenue from asking autistics with neurotypical children; to asking autistics with neurotypical siblings; to asking autistic children with neurotypical classmates, there is paradoxically still very much that we do not get about neurotypicalism.

Diagnostic Criteria for Neurotypical Disorder

If you arrived on this page because you are seeking information about your recently diagnosed neurotypical child or sibling, do not fret! While these symptoms may indeed sound horrifying, all is not lost. There is a genocidal benevolent charity known as Neurotypicalism Speaks that is, of course, run entirely by us normal autistic people and that hopes to one day exterminate cure neurotypicalism forever.